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Literature Text
The doorbell rang sometime later. I knew it wasn’t Jimmy because he had called me to say that he was going to hang out with Jessie.
I opened the door and was surprised to see Azura.
“Hello there.” She greeted and smiled.
“H-hi.” I stuttered. “Uh… Come in. Please.” I gestured over to the couch and led her there. “What brings you around?” I asked curiously. She lived on a reservation about an hour away from my house, so she had to have had an important reason to come by.
Her smile shrunk the tiniest bit. “I have a message from the old group. I honestly think that this is their issue and they should deal with it themselves. I’m too damn nice, so I agreed to pass it along.”
Great. I was overjoyed. “What is it?” I asked wearily.
She broke eye contact, as if ashamed. “They said if you dump Jimmy and his ‘loser friends’ they’ll think about letting you back in.”
I shook my head in disbelief. “I don’t know if anyone noticed, and I’m surprised YOU haven’t noticed, that I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. I won’t throw that all away for some old friends who need to stop being literal stereotypes! You can tell them I said that too… I don’t really care. But I do care about Jimmy, and nothing will ever change that.”
She nodded. “I figured you would say as much. I’m not going to say I understand you, but you’re still my friend. And if you ever need someone to cry to, here’s my number.”
She held out a piece of paper. I took it and slipped it into my pocket. I hugged her and said “Thank you”. And I meant it.
I asked her if she wanted to stay but she was leaving to go to her grandmother’s house for Christmas.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
So I was alone with my thoughts.
I will admit, I was in love with Jimmy. His sarcastic attitude made me laugh, his bedroom walls made me see how creative he was, the 7/11 bathroom made me realize that even if he said he didn’t care, he was still hurting.
I was bothered by that arm. The arm that used to have whatshername on it. It made me angry, and it made me want to punch the whore that hurt him so bad.
I was never going to bring her up again. I never wanted to see that terrible face that he had made the other day at his house.
And for the first time, I was feeling guilt. There was a feeling, deep inside my brain, that I was the only thing keeping him in this hellhole.
I didn’t want him to suffer anymore because of a girl. I didn’t want to push him even further into the crippling embrace of drugs. Or deepen the scars on his arms.
After the Green Day concert, I was going to tell him that it was okay.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A week later, Jimmy and I arrived in San Francisco. A stadium where Green Day was playing. We held hands as we walked down to our seats, front row. The icing on the cake was when we were backstage having a conversation with the members.
“I’m Jimmy, and this is my girlfriend, Frankie.” Jimmy introduced us hesitantly. Billie Joe Armstrong, Tre` Cool, and Mike Dirnt shook our hands.
“How are you guys today? Take a seat.” Billie gestured to the couch next to him.
“Oh we’re great.” I answered him. “And my boyfriend wants you to look at something.”
He elbowed me and scowled. Billie laughed and Tre` looked intrigued. “Well, let’s see it..”
I handed it to them, much to Jimmy’s chagrin. After they all passed it around, they shared a look. “This actually fits perfectly with the new stuff we’ve written. Would you mind if we used some of it?”
Jimmy’s mouth dropped open. “Uh.”
I laughed. “He wouldn’t mind at all.”
“I’m honored to use this, Jimmy. It was great talking and meeting with you guys.”
We got escorted out after getting a few things signed.
“Soo… aren’t you glad I talked you into giving them that stuff?”
He pulled me into a long kiss, showing me exactly how grateful he was. “I don’t know what I would do without you.” He said sincerely.
I scoffed. “You’d be fine.”
And he would be, but I decided to put it off.
Four months later, Jimmy came tearing through my door. Alarmed, I stood up from my seat on the couch.
“What’s going on?” I asked.
He looked excited. “Do you have a cd player in your room?”
I nodded nd he shot up the stairs, me at his heals. “Wait!” I yelled, laughing.
He popped in a cd and skipped to number two. Green Day’s recognizable sound came though the speakers. Then, familiar words came through. “I’m the son of rage and love, The Jesus of suburbia.”
I jumped into Jimmy’s arms. He said, “It really happened. It even says, ‘Words of Jesus of Suburbia’ by Jimmy Smith.’”
“I told you so.” I said, examining the cd called “American Idiot”. “I mean, they sent you letters asking for continuation ideas. It looks like the whole album is about you…”
Suddenly, he looked into my eyes, searching. I understood in that moment. The wordless question that he didn’t know he was asking me had to be answered.
I took the cd, placed it in his hands, held his face, and kissed him for the last time ever. “Jimmy, I will always love you. Go.”
(Jimmy’s POV)
Jimmy got out of his mustang 15 minutes later to grab his things.
His mother sat on her bed, watching him stuff bags full of anything he felt like grabbing. She didn’t try to stop him when he went out the door.
His mustang started again without any problems. To say that he was shocked when his mother came running out the door and banged on his hood would be an understatement.
After a moment of thinking, he got out hesitantly. She hugged him, and he hugged her back.
In that moment, he knew that she regretted the alcoholism, the boyfriends, and the harsh words, but it was too late. He was already gone.
He pried her arms off of him and drove away.
(Frankie’s POV)
A year later, when I was finally over Jimmy, I was watching the news with my boyfriend Will in my college dorm.
I hadn’t heard anything from Jimmy, or about Jimmy, in a long time. He had stopped talking to Jessie completely about 5 months ago.
A sad looking reporter came on, along with Jimmy’s picture. “A Mr. Jimmy Smith’s body was found today in the bay. The police have determined it as suicide. His suicide note, which was leaked earlier, said only three words. ‘I’m sorry Frankie’.”
Will looked at me. “Hey, wasn’t that…?” He trailed off when he saw my tear stained face.
“I’m sorry too, Jimmy.”
I opened the door and was surprised to see Azura.
“Hello there.” She greeted and smiled.
“H-hi.” I stuttered. “Uh… Come in. Please.” I gestured over to the couch and led her there. “What brings you around?” I asked curiously. She lived on a reservation about an hour away from my house, so she had to have had an important reason to come by.
Her smile shrunk the tiniest bit. “I have a message from the old group. I honestly think that this is their issue and they should deal with it themselves. I’m too damn nice, so I agreed to pass it along.”
Great. I was overjoyed. “What is it?” I asked wearily.
She broke eye contact, as if ashamed. “They said if you dump Jimmy and his ‘loser friends’ they’ll think about letting you back in.”
I shook my head in disbelief. “I don’t know if anyone noticed, and I’m surprised YOU haven’t noticed, that I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. I won’t throw that all away for some old friends who need to stop being literal stereotypes! You can tell them I said that too… I don’t really care. But I do care about Jimmy, and nothing will ever change that.”
She nodded. “I figured you would say as much. I’m not going to say I understand you, but you’re still my friend. And if you ever need someone to cry to, here’s my number.”
She held out a piece of paper. I took it and slipped it into my pocket. I hugged her and said “Thank you”. And I meant it.
I asked her if she wanted to stay but she was leaving to go to her grandmother’s house for Christmas.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
So I was alone with my thoughts.
I will admit, I was in love with Jimmy. His sarcastic attitude made me laugh, his bedroom walls made me see how creative he was, the 7/11 bathroom made me realize that even if he said he didn’t care, he was still hurting.
I was bothered by that arm. The arm that used to have whatshername on it. It made me angry, and it made me want to punch the whore that hurt him so bad.
I was never going to bring her up again. I never wanted to see that terrible face that he had made the other day at his house.
And for the first time, I was feeling guilt. There was a feeling, deep inside my brain, that I was the only thing keeping him in this hellhole.
I didn’t want him to suffer anymore because of a girl. I didn’t want to push him even further into the crippling embrace of drugs. Or deepen the scars on his arms.
After the Green Day concert, I was going to tell him that it was okay.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A week later, Jimmy and I arrived in San Francisco. A stadium where Green Day was playing. We held hands as we walked down to our seats, front row. The icing on the cake was when we were backstage having a conversation with the members.
“I’m Jimmy, and this is my girlfriend, Frankie.” Jimmy introduced us hesitantly. Billie Joe Armstrong, Tre` Cool, and Mike Dirnt shook our hands.
“How are you guys today? Take a seat.” Billie gestured to the couch next to him.
“Oh we’re great.” I answered him. “And my boyfriend wants you to look at something.”
He elbowed me and scowled. Billie laughed and Tre` looked intrigued. “Well, let’s see it..”
I handed it to them, much to Jimmy’s chagrin. After they all passed it around, they shared a look. “This actually fits perfectly with the new stuff we’ve written. Would you mind if we used some of it?”
Jimmy’s mouth dropped open. “Uh.”
I laughed. “He wouldn’t mind at all.”
“I’m honored to use this, Jimmy. It was great talking and meeting with you guys.”
We got escorted out after getting a few things signed.
“Soo… aren’t you glad I talked you into giving them that stuff?”
He pulled me into a long kiss, showing me exactly how grateful he was. “I don’t know what I would do without you.” He said sincerely.
I scoffed. “You’d be fine.”
And he would be, but I decided to put it off.
Four months later, Jimmy came tearing through my door. Alarmed, I stood up from my seat on the couch.
“What’s going on?” I asked.
He looked excited. “Do you have a cd player in your room?”
I nodded nd he shot up the stairs, me at his heals. “Wait!” I yelled, laughing.
He popped in a cd and skipped to number two. Green Day’s recognizable sound came though the speakers. Then, familiar words came through. “I’m the son of rage and love, The Jesus of suburbia.”
I jumped into Jimmy’s arms. He said, “It really happened. It even says, ‘Words of Jesus of Suburbia’ by Jimmy Smith.’”
“I told you so.” I said, examining the cd called “American Idiot”. “I mean, they sent you letters asking for continuation ideas. It looks like the whole album is about you…”
Suddenly, he looked into my eyes, searching. I understood in that moment. The wordless question that he didn’t know he was asking me had to be answered.
I took the cd, placed it in his hands, held his face, and kissed him for the last time ever. “Jimmy, I will always love you. Go.”
(Jimmy’s POV)
Jimmy got out of his mustang 15 minutes later to grab his things.
His mother sat on her bed, watching him stuff bags full of anything he felt like grabbing. She didn’t try to stop him when he went out the door.
His mustang started again without any problems. To say that he was shocked when his mother came running out the door and banged on his hood would be an understatement.
After a moment of thinking, he got out hesitantly. She hugged him, and he hugged her back.
In that moment, he knew that she regretted the alcoholism, the boyfriends, and the harsh words, but it was too late. He was already gone.
He pried her arms off of him and drove away.
(Frankie’s POV)
A year later, when I was finally over Jimmy, I was watching the news with my boyfriend Will in my college dorm.
I hadn’t heard anything from Jimmy, or about Jimmy, in a long time. He had stopped talking to Jessie completely about 5 months ago.
A sad looking reporter came on, along with Jimmy’s picture. “A Mr. Jimmy Smith’s body was found today in the bay. The police have determined it as suicide. His suicide note, which was leaked earlier, said only three words. ‘I’m sorry Frankie’.”
Will looked at me. “Hey, wasn’t that…?” He trailed off when he saw my tear stained face.
“I’m sorry too, Jimmy.”
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Ugh.so yeah done. be happy. idk I can't umpolad it like a normal person cauze dA hates me.
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This was great. I totally loved it!!